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Example of one of my student's work - What do you think?

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Started by Tanya Phillips 08 Apr 2013 7:44pm () Replies (2)

Thanks Jane for setting this up.

I am happy to upload some student work in exchange for your moderation help!

I have uploaded one so far - A student interpreting the movie Chronicle.

Shall we share marking comments and grades?

Freud and Chronicle - Aranui 



  • Jane Dewar (View all users posts) 08 Apr 2013 11:26pm ()

    Hey Tanya

    What a wonderful thing this is! Have read the Chronicle exemplar and used the rubric, ( which is not set in stone!!!), and have come up with the following.

    In terms of ideas the student has a knowledge of the film and what is being looked at with the three players but not as great an understanding of Freudian theory. He/She uses critical theory sure and primary text discussion but there is no synthesising to me happening. He/ she mentions the text and then tags on the references to the Freudian thoughts. It would have been helpful, I reckon, to have come back to the basic thoughts of just what the Freudian aspects were at the beginning, so they could be synthesised. So on an idea call, using the rubric, which is not perfect!!!!!, I would be going a 3, because he/she does show a depth of thought and is beginning to incorporate a critique but it is fairly limited, I think.

    In terms of Audience/ Purpose it is absolutely where it needs to be but not totally perceptive so a 3.

    In the structure field this chap combines the critical texts and the primary but doesn't synthesise them. To do this the student needs to try and outline just what the Freudian analysis actually is concerned with, by telling us just what it is all about, and then deliberate. So for me a 2.

    The language one is the hard one too, I have gone for the process here in the rubric, and I want to know what you think.

    With this there is a clear line to the chap setting up a premise about how the film works with the Freudian model and there is an obvious idea of the investigative process, and has chosen a literary field that is well known. So a 3 

    So where does this leave this piece?

    I would be going a 2/3 on a formative submission, which is around a high Achieved/ Merit, and then give feedback that said:

    In the beginning, outline just what the Freudian model is and how it works. You are assuming on knowledge that may not be apparent.

    Throughout the piece, work on incoroporating/ synthesising, how Freud's theory relates to the film. 

    Think this is really cool and would be awesome with some more work. I would be going an Achieved/ Merit at this point but can see with an integration of the Freudian theory and just what the Id etc are, it could easily be an E.

    That's my take using our rubric, but bear in mind the rubric needs work and this chap knows the film well and has a  handle on the theory. He just needs to point that out.

    This is where English is so much more demanding!!

    Would love other thoughts here. 

    i am trying to upload an oral file to see what you think about that.










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English AS 91479,

English AS 91479,

Group to facilitate discussion among senior secondary English teachers around critical text Level 3 standard